Published on January 2, 2008 By CLWebb In Religion
"Then summoning him, his lord said to him, 'You wicked slave, I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. 'Should you not also have had mercy on your fellow slave, in the same way that I had mercy on you?' "And his lord, moved with anger, handed him over to the torturers until he should repay all that was owed him. "My heavenly Father will also do the same to you, if each of you does not forgive his brother from your heart."
Matt 18:32-35 (NASB)

I have been hurt many times: the Christmas when I didn’t get the toy I wanted, the afternoon I moved from away my friends, the night when my girlfriend broke up with me, the day a woman sat in my office and told me I was the worst Christian she has ever seen, the evening when a committee of men threatened my family, and multiple times more. But I find an interesting thing takes place in these circumstances; I find the strength waiting for me to continue on and to forgive. Then I feel a curious sensation accompanying this question: “what if I don’t WANT to forgive?”

What about that? The strength to forgive is waiting for me. I can be healed and grow. But what if I LIKE to be angry with someone? What if I LIKE to chain that person up in my heart and hold them there, torturing them with my every thought? What if I LIKE to see them agonizing in my mind because of the anger I feel toward them? What if, instead of simply imagining, I actually try to punish them by talking about them, writing about them; manipulating every thought until I am convinced that they deserve the punishment I have given them???

Listen again to Jesus’ words: “My heavenly Father will also do the same to you [handing you over to the torturers], if each of you does not forgive his brother from your heart.”

I heard a pastor speak about forgiveness in this manner. He said that the heart was a place from which to love, not a place in which to imprison someone.

Think about this verse:
Never take your own revenge, beloved, but leave room for the wrath of God, for it is written, "VENGEANCE IS MINE, I WILL REPAY," says the Lord. Romans 12:19 (NASB)
If you punish a person in your heart or mind or if you take action against them either by word or deed, you have interfered where God wants to intervene. On the other hand, if you forgive them and love them and pray for them, then the Lord can work in their life and you can grow in yours. Just remember, the strength to forgive is waiting for you, if only you will lay aside your pride and take it.

Comments
on Jan 02, 2008

Good article, Chris, and some excellent advice. While I'm sure it's quite general, it applies to our situation directly, and I'm sure we weren't far from your mind when you wrote it. With that in mind, let me say the following:

We're in the healing process, and I'm working on forgiveness. But I can't stay here. For the past several months, I've desperately looked for a sign that God wanted us to stay here and do something. It never came. I made a brief appearance at the Poker Run in the summer, hoping desperately that I would find something. All I got were icy stares and dirty looks. Not one person approached me.

We went to the Christmas Eve service to say our goodbyes to the community, but again, icy stares and dirty looks.

I will never claim to be innocent, Chris, and I don't mind the offenses against me, seriously. I'm a big boy, I can take it. It was the fact that their venom and hatred were directed against Amy and the kids. THEY didn't deserve it, and none of them have done ANYTHING to draw the venom that we drew. They didn't deserve three years of being virtual outcasts, and the targets of malicious gossip, rumour, and, yes, in at least one case, perjury.

I learned some years ago that you can forgive someone but you don't have to be around them. We'll move on from Lefors, and as the years go by, it will fade into memories, some pleasant, some unpleasant. But there is no home for us in Lefors, of that much I am sure.

My concern, though, is for the next stranger that comes across your door. Didn't Paul tell us that by being hospitable to strangers, we may be entertaining angels unaware? How many angels, broken and weary, have been turned away by that town, and specifically, that church.

I admire you, Chris, but I can't BE you. We have different places in ministry. I believe you are up to the challenge that community presents; while I, quite certainly, am not. You and your family will never be far from our prayers, and I pray for the day when that community will be known far and wide for its Christian character.